Lucky
by CrispyCritter88
Summary: I wonder if he knows how lucky he is...EO


A short little fiction...post Closure( Enjoy!  
  
The thoughts of Elliot Stabler.... If he asks me one more question about my partner I may deck him. He's a good kid, but sometimes he gets on my nerves. Olivia was gone when I left the station so I brought Brian along to help me out. I didn't realize it was going to turn into 20 questions about Benson.  
  
"Why doesn't she date?" Brian asked me as we walked up the stairs to Harper's apartment.  
  
"She dates," I say simply and continue up the stairs, wondering when this barrage of questions is going to end. I don't understand what his sudden infatuation with her is. I got my answer the minute that Olivia walked in the door.  
  
He'd slept with her. How did I know? I knew because of the look he was giving her, I know that look well. It's a look of lust, admiration, fear and love, all combined into one. A look that a man can only get in the presence of a woman like that. I know that look because I've given it to her many times.  
  
The only difference is Cassidy is allowed to look at Olivia that way. After all, he's not her partner, he's not married, and he doesn't have four kids.  
  
But he also doesn't deserve to share a bed with her. He doesn't deserve to see lust, sweetness, pleasure and god forbid love in her eyes.  
  
I'm snapped out of my train of thought as I see the two of them arguing. They are arguing like two people who have had sex and are now uncomfortable around each other. He's like a little boy on the playground who pulls on a girl's pigtail to let her know that he likes her.  
  
The day drags on, I should just ask her. Not that she owes me an explanation; she doesn't have to tell me anything. She deserves better then him though. He's just some punk out to save the world. I bet he's a fast lover, the kind of guy who is more worried about his needs then about the girl he's with.  
  
I see Olivia needing someone who takes his time. She needs a man who can hit every right spot on her body; she needs a man who would know how lucky he was to be with her. I wonder if he knows how lucky he is to have been with her.  
  
We just got a call, Munch and Cassidy are brining in a suspect. As they bring him through the hallway Brian stops Olivia. Oh to be a fly on the wall while they are talking. I wonder what he is saying to her, he's probably asking her out on a date. I wonder if she'll say yes. She probably will, after all, they are both young, good looking and single.  
  
She stands in front of her locker now, I just need to ask her, finally I do, "How long have you been sleeping with Cassidy?" I ask. There it's out there now. Part of me doesn't want to know the answer.  
  
Denial. I knew that was the first thing I'd get from her. But I know her too well; I know when she's not telling me the truth, after a little more prodding she finally tells me the truth. Great, now I'm going to have to hear all about their hot steamy love while we drive along in the squad car. I guess I deserve it though, after all the stories about soccer, family dinners and math tests that she has had to hear about over the years.  
  
The next thing she says surprises me, "he wants to see me again."  
  
I don't know what to say back to her. Then it comes out, before I can stop my words they escape: "can you blame him?"  
  
She looks at me surprised. I finally break the silence, and tell her that things will be okay, it happens.  
  
I just wonder if Brian Cassidy knows how lucky he is.  
  
The thoughts of Olivia Benson....  
  
Can I blame him? I think to myself after he says it. What does that mean Elliot? I want to scream at him. Does that mean that if he were in his position he would want to see me again? I don't understand Elliot, explain it to me! My mind yells at him.  
  
I never meant to sleep with Cassidy, it just happened. I wanted to be with Elliot that night, but he was at home with his family. The entire time I was with Brian, all I could think about was how much I wished it were Elliot's bed that I would wake up in.  
  
Elliot tells me it happens, he tells me to be nice to Cassidy now, and he'll get over it eventually. It happens...he says again.  
  
I wish it had happened with you, I almost say. I wonder if that man has any idea how much I love him, how much I ache to touch him, to kiss him, to wake up in his arms every morning.  
  
But it's not me that he wakes up to, it's his wife.  
  
I wonder if she knows how lucky she is.  
  
The thoughts of Brian Cassidy...  
  
"She said your name," I say to detective Stabler as he steps out of the car. We are on a case together again, because Olivia is out for the day. It's been months since I slept with her, since I fell in love with her.  
  
"Who said what?" he asks me with a puzzled look on his face?"  
  
I don't answer him; I just close my door and head into the flower shop where some woman was assaulted.  
  
She had said his name right before she collapsed on to me that night. I don't think she even realized that during her release the name "Elliot" escaped her lips in ecstasy.  
  
I see the way they look at each other. I see the way that his hand always lingers on her back when they exit a room. I see the way that there hands intertwine when they are looking things up on the computer. I see it all.  
  
I always thought that since I was the available one, that she'd choose me. I was the safe choice, the one who would give her the world if I could, but that does matter.  
  
Olivia Benson doesn't want the world, she wants him. She wants Elliot Stabler.  
  
I wonder if he knows how lucky he is.  
  
The thoughts of Kathy Stabler...  
  
I can tell something is wrong the second he walks in the door. He smiles and kisses my cheek, but it's not because he wants to, it's because it's a motion that he is used to doing.  
  
He grabs a beer from the fridge and sits on the couch. Twisting the bottle in his hands, closing his eyes and sighing, something is wrong.  
  
"Elliot, what is it?" I ask him sitting down next to him  
  
"Nothing," he says taking a sip of his beer.  
  
"Is it work? Is something the matter?" I pry, trying to get my husband to listen to me.  
  
"It's just, Olivia did something really stupid," he finally says setting the bottle onto the coffee table.  
  
Oh the O word, sometimes it's all he talks about as far as work goes. I like to think it's because he is trying to shield me from the gruesome world he sees, but sometimes I think he's hinting to me, that she is important to him.  
  
"What did she do?" I ask, not sure I want to hear the answer.  
  
"She slept with Cassidy," he says simply, looking at me for my reaction.  
  
A giggle escapes my lips, "Oh Elliot, you have to know she has a life outside the department," I say putting my hand on his knee.  
  
He glares at me, "It was stupid," he repeats standing up.  
  
What does he want me to say? Sometimes he forgets that I'm his wife, and I don't give a damn who his partner is sleeping with.  
  
"Elliot, she's a big girl," I say standing up next to him  
  
"Even big girls need to make good decisions Kathy, she didn't," he says to me walking up the stairs.  
  
I sigh, sit on the couch and finish off his beer. My husband loves his partner more then he loves me.  
  
I wonder if she knows how lucky she is. 


End file.
